Who Is Mark Rathbun?

I really think Mr. Rathbun is losing his mind. Here’s an excerpt from his blog:

Many people here have pointed out David Miscavige’s technical ”why” that lead to the Golden Age of Tech (the blind have been leading the blind) is not a why since it can lead one to ask “why?” of the “why.”   Others have pointed out that if it were the why, then the “who” would be David Miscavige since he had been leading the way for a decade and a half by then.

LOL wat? Those Rathbun genes starting to catch up to you son.

Activity is up, Stats are up, Trollin is getting turned up. Finally took the time to fix all the categories and customize them. We are getting major search engine traffic. Newsletters going out soon.

Rumors are circulating that within the Independent Scientology group a love triangle exists. Marty Rathbun, Mike Rinder, & Mosey Rathbun. We were emailed by a person identified as martylovescock@hushmail.com and this was all explained. Apparently Monique Rathbun really loved Mike Rinder and it was a struggle to see him while she was with Marty and finally she caved into Marty’s OT9001 power level.

Her love for Mike Rinder still couldn’t die he was just cool like a cucumb. So apparently everyone is fucking. Now will she have Mike’s or Marty’s baby? Hmmmmmmmm. We will report back on this soon.

So we already talked about how Marty and Monique tied the knot and proceeded to have sex the Scientology way by wrapping their tentacles around each other. I wanted to write a single piece on Mosey Rathbun to kind of describe her and what she brings to the table.

First off she’s black so automatically she’s got Obama’s support. Next you’ll realize she looks like a man which is probably why Marty loves her because she doesn’t take a beating without fighting back like Rinder did. Her father probably doesn’t agree with her choice of cracker men but thats ok because he doesn’t understand Marty’s OT powers. However her younger hip brother Tyrone is perfectly ok with Marty because they relate to each other through Nas’s music. Marty actually performed on stage with Tyrone’s band once and Marty got a little to drunk at the after party but no mounted officers there so no problems.

Monique Rathbun fits right on into the Rathbun family. What is another nut gonna hurt?

As it turns out our best friend Mark Rathbun had a little ’spell’ down in New Orleans where the alcohol flows like oil in the gulf. Apparently he gets trashed with his black wife and friends and notices a kid with a basketball and decides to physically check the kid and grab the ball and go all MJ. What he didn’t notice was a mounted officer watching him looking like a drunk belligerent jackass.

The officer told him that he should go and he had too much to drink and since Mark has a problem with authority ever since the 3rd grade he said I have a wife in there I need to get her. The cop put him against the wall cuffed him and brought him to jail. Marty goes onto describe this jail as a tree hugging happy place where everyone helps everybody. I’m pretty sure this is a cover story and he got severely raped multiple times. He had been seen walking differently when he was released so I think this only helps my theory.

While Marty Rathbun was locked away he was worried that his wonderful dark chocolate lover wife didn’t know where he was and she would go around looking everywhere. Marty’s high level OT powers failed him that night. Instead of telepathically speaking to her he had to use a phone. =[

In the end Marty got out of jail and felt ashamed, had to make a blogpost and show everyone that he can’t handle his alcohol. Poor guy